Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Ahón ni ìpínnlè ẹnu.

For those that can’t read Yoruba, the title translates to “The tongue is the border of the mouth.” This means there is a limit to everything.

People forget that!

The post is conversational. The Yoruba proverbs begin a new conversation and it also describes my feelings regarding the situation but it is all one story. I wish I could have written the entire post in Yoruba but I won’t because of obvious reasons.

Eni à ńgbé gègè ni yó ba ara rè jé.[1]

Allied won’t you buy our Aso ebi?

You are doing aso ebi?

Of course now – Don’t you know the naming ceremony for twins is a big deal?

It’s true. Ahh, I will also have twins ooo. How much is the aso ebi?

It is not expensive. $150 for both Ankara and Gele
(Why is every Ankara and Gele either $100 or $150? I am yet to see someone say $80 even $125, Na wa for Naija round up.)

I will send the money to your BA Account but how do I get my aso?

You know what? Make the money $170; I will mail them to you

Okay

Thank you. I will also celebrate with you oh...

Amin

Bí ọmọdé bá gun òkè àgbà, ó ńláti gbón.[2]

Brother Taju, please sew my Ankara well oh. The party is tonight

Allied, I sha don’t like when you bring me a rush job. You are going to pay ‘rush rush’ money

How much is “rush rush” money?

$70

Eh? Will the cloth then iron and fold itself?

You are truly from Ijebu

Na you sabi. I am going to pay you $30 plus bring in customers. I will take some of your business cards to the party tonight (Yeah right)

Ah, thank you. Pay $45

$35

Ahh, you are too stingy. Just bring the money

Enìkan kì í jé “Àwá dé.”[3]

I like that girl’s Ankara.

It is beautiful. But Allied, I thought you also bought Aso-ebi?

Yes now. I am wearing it

But it looks like you are the only one wearing this Ankara …

No, look at that table. One, two, three... Eight people are wearing it now.

And about thirty people are wearing the other one… Let me find out she sold you the left over Ankara.

Maybe the family is wearing something else... sebi I am just a friend…

Sade and Tolani are also friends but they are wearing the other Ankara. You do have to ask yourself, why everyone wearing the same Ankara pattern as yours is sitting together at the same table. You better go and join them…

You are not serious

Àgbà kì í fàárò họ ìdí kó má kan funfun[4]

Excuse me, Aunty Bose want you to join the others at the table in the extreme corner

Which Aunty? May I know why?

I guess it will be easier to coordinate the party if we are all together

(at the table)

Good evening Aunty

Good Evening. I want you to sit here with the others. Did Peju assign a task to you?

No Aunty

Well, you have to be assigned a task. It is the reason you are wearing the Ankara.

(during the party)

Allied did you serve table 4? (Yes aunty)

Allied, go and bring the cooler of Jollof rice from the truck (Yes aunty)

Allied why did you give that woman both meat and fish? (Sorry aunty)

Allied what is wrong with you? You are young, stop acting sluggish… (I rolled my eyes at aunty)
Allied take my daughter to the bathroom (Yes aunty)


Ìbàjé ọjó kan ò tán bòrò[5]

Aunty I am leaving. Good night

Leaving ke? We still have to pack the coolers in the van and clean the hall.

I have to go aunty. I need to be somewhere very early tomorrow

I see… After you have collected my Ankara – You are now running away when its time to work

Aunty, I don’t understand

If you knew you cannot work, why are you wearing my FREE Ankara? I told Peju to give them to people that will help me with the party. You should have bought the other Aso-ebi like everybody else.

Aunty, I bought this Ankara from Peju.

Èèyàn tí ò nítìjú ojú kan ni ìbá ní; a gbórín a tó tẹṣin.[6]

Peju, you really disappointed me. Why did you sell me that Ankara? Not only was it FREE, it was also meant to be worn by the servers of the lady who coordinated your party

Yes, but you did not have to help if you didn’t want to plus the servers are also my friends.

That is not the point. Did you tell that your Aunty Bose that you sold the Ankara because the lady disgraced me big time. You should have told me from the get go. I really feel cheated.

Allied, why are u making this a big deal? It is not that serious. It was my party and there were other people wearing the Ankara

There were Aunty Bose’s servers

Do you think you are better than they are? You think you are this mighty big shot?

Peju, obviously you miss the point. If there was no more Ankara, why did you make me buy that one? And if you wanted me to help out at the party - You should have said so. I feel cheated.

Are u calling me a cheat?

I want you to know that Àgbà tó mọ ìtìjú kì í folè ṣeré[7]


Ànán-mánàán ẹtú jìnfìn; oní-mónìí ẹtú jìnfìn; ẹran mìíràn ò sí nígbó léhìn ẹtu?[8]

I shouldn’t blame her. I think I have some kind of sticker on my forehead that says “gullible”. This is the 5th time that someone has sold me “extra” Ankara but this has been the worst experience. Was the $150 really worth it on her part? I have two options. Stop buying aso-ebi or I should start asking “Will EVERYone wear this Ankara?

Blogville, am I overreacting?

*****************************************
[1] It is the person who is revered that will disgrace himself or herself.(People who are placed on pedestals have ample opportunities to topple themselves.)

[2] If a child ascends the height of maturity, he/she must become wise.(Wisdom goes with age.)
[3] One person is not entitled to say, “Here we come.”(However mighty, one person is still only one person.)

[4] A grown person does not scratch his buttocks in the early morning without showing some whiteness.(Improper behavior brings disgrace.)
[5] The disgrace one incurs in one day does not disappear that soon.(Reputations are easy to destroy but most difficult to repair.)

[6] A shameless person deserves to have only one eye, that one as large as a horse's.(Human endowments are wasted on graceless people.)
[7] An elder who is wary of disgrace will not play at stealing.
[8] Yesterday the antelope was caught in a pit-trap; today the antelope is caught in a pit-trap; is there no other animal in the forest besides the antelope?(If the same person repeatedly finds himself or herself in difficulties others are able to avoid, one should look to the person's character for the explanation.

51 comments:

Shubby Doo said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Shubby Doo said...

You are not over-reacting...you paid $170 (plus $35 to sew) for ankara that should have been free. You then find out that she sold you server's ankara, didn't ask you to help but when you did (because your attire warranted it) you got you insulted for being sluggish.

pele... she implied the problem was yours...it was not...God saw that you were there for her...God saw you didn't mind help until you couldn't...i don’t know what else to say but pele

this aso ebi thing is just getting out of hand...last time i was in Lagos my aunts and uncles nearly came to blows because of it at a birthday party

30+ said...

First even with all my yoruba ogbongeciousness - my head hurts.

Secondly, peju o gbadun rara elo ni ankara patapata N5k in naija in short you have spent N24k.

Well e ni su lo gbagbe eni ti o ko ko gbagbe and

Ojo ma npa eniyan wo ile kan ni emeji so when ti rain ba pa Peju the second time you know what to do.

You are too nice ni, I feel for you

Afrobabe said...

how can I not be first??? didnt this just go up?

Afrobabe said...

lmao...ok I didnt want to laugh cos that is extremely annoying...

I would have been extremely upset and wouldn't have served jack....

Imagine...servers ankara...na lie oh...I no gree...absolute rubbish, I would also delete her number and hope she gets diahorea from the food....

mchhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew

Jaycee said...

Wowwwwwwwww...

First, I love the way you told the story...as always.

Second, it seems like those 5 occurrences were most likely just coincidences, because I'm thinking the planners of these parties did not collaborate to trick u into buying "extra" ankara. But also, you're right in the sense that u need to make sure what u're buying is the right one and not be too gullible next time.

A lot of people take advantage of kind and generous people, that's the way this world is. To be kind and generous does not mean one should be foolish. So yes, you're not overreacting...you're merely renewing your definition of who you are...

ps: The first time I really bought ankara for anything was last yr, and i asked for what colors everyone was wearing first...and I saw that my friend was giving me the one assigned to her "friends." This post will only make me more stringent in knowing the specificity of the ankaras I will buy in the future...lolll...

rethots said...

No, you overreact not, what your 'friend' seems not to understand is that no amount of money is sufficient to buy self-dignity, which, if that happened to me....she's lost (her self-dignity) with me.

Until, people learn and understand that self-respect (dignity et al) cannot be bought with money (or how 'rich' one is) such, attitudes (unfortunately) will persist.

Self-dignity for auction. Lol

Nicely written, whoa! you managed (oops, actually did) to disgrace my Yoruba sha. Bien

Charizard said...

I think not...mehn...ur underreacting gan sef...the things people do in the name of friendship...

onydchic said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
onydchic said...

Meeehn....

I would have busted a cap in her behind. Or something. That's horrible. I thought you were actually telling a fictional story.

This asoebi of a business is ridiculous. Luckily it seems to be a yoruba person trend (at least I think so, im not sure o). I don't see the point in forcing materials on people for money. If you aren't happy I'm coming at all, then its ur own. On top naming ceremony??? Kai.

As for your friend, I don't know what to say but she really betrayed your trust, and for me, that will be hard to get over. You need to make her understand that she messed up.

darkelcee said...

u aint over reacting my dear

that was wicked!

Free ankara for servers? haaa i feel u baje

Ko si eni to le ba mi dan iru jagbajantis yen wo. rubbish

Dont buy any again jare. but buy mine *wink* ok?

Writefreak said...

No not at all, you;re not overreacting...this is what i do..as a rule, i do not buy aso ebi! The only time i buy is when it is unavoidable like my family members or a friend that's as close as a family member! You wanna join my club? That's policy!

Pele dear, it's really annoying!

NigerianDramaQueen said...
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NigerianDramaQueen said...

Ahhhhhh
Shewwwwww
Omo your not reacting oh! Wetin come concern gorimakpa with shower cap again? She must give you refund gan sef. Na wetin na

DiAmOnD hawk said...

are you calling me a cheat?
yessssssssssssssssssssssss. YOU LIED TO ME. that should have been your response. lol. I dont like to waste words with people... it is what it is. She was on the defensive and wanted to switch the blame...

trust me when i say I WILL GET MY REFUND O... no joke...
infact did you help her paint a reverse scenario... where she was the one on the receiving end?

the nerve of her... to suggest that you're feeling too much of yourself... shame on her... big shame on her...

Allied... after 5 times... come on now... i hope there wont be a 6th time...

and can someone translate 30+'s yoruba comment please????

Enigma said...

First of all, you managed to get me tongue-tied reading those yoruba 'owes'..even harder interpreting some!

I HATE all these 'aso-ebi' businesses, so much so bad i dont attend parties and its so typical of yorubas...

Over reacting? nahhh... i would cut all ties with anyone who did that to me..( i dont hold grudges, i just dont see the value of 'that' friendship) as u rightly put it, its different if you asked me to help..which i would gladly do for a friend.. not take me for granted several times over and then walk all over me!

thanks for stopping by..

naijalines said...

Props o, sista. Your knowledge of yoruba is amazing. I had to read the english translations to properly decode. But that takes nothing away from this brilliant piece.

My apinni's worth? You are certainly not over-reacting. Personally I don't buy aso-ebi cos I don't like the rip-off ventures that many have turned it into. In any case I hardly ever attend parties where it's been required. The decision is yours though, not an easy one if it's a close friend.

fantasy queen said...

totally not over reacting, as you hardly reacted at all...

OluwaDee said...

Overreacting ke!

Peju cheated you, n that was soooo wrong. She is not a good friend oh, don't buy her aso-ebi again.

Pls don't let that stop you 4rm buy aso-ebi oh. Cos you have some friends who are transparent.

I must say the aso-ebi is really expensive $150, thats like 75 pounds.
Am selling my aso-ebi @ 70pounds and it includes 2 gele's and 2 laces (4 yards each).

I like the way you wrote this post. 7 your post on 14th & serenity was really good.

I definitely won't be dancing to lo rile. I kinda prefer ijo ya.

Atutupoyoyo said...

Firstly your Yoruba verbage and application is nigh on flawless.

You will forgive me for laughing small at this your plight but each of those your little intros reminded me of the interludes they used to have in Frasier. Each one would have some apparently random title like "Green cocks can only fly at dawn" but it would set the scene for the subsequent viewing in which all would be explained.

Of course you are not overreacting. It is your prerogative to spend your dooch on more fruitful ventures and certainly not FREE aso ebis. This is a dupe masquerading as a charitable favour and you were right to expose it.

bumight said...

where is my comment?

neways, you are not overreacating, infact, you have not reacted at all!

Free-flowing Florida said...

no, dear. u r not over-reacting. ur friend was insensitive n rude. sometimes, being 'ms nice' dey breed insult

The Life of a Stranger called me said...

What kind of friend is she, to think it's ok to treat you like dirt. Trully she's no friend of yours. Not only did she think you were not her equal and therefore should be assigned to workers duty, she chested you out of money, and had the nerve to laugh in your face when pulled up on it. Have nothing more to do with. Keep your distance. But still be friends. But know what

Omosewa said...

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I AM SO MADDDDD FOR YOU, I SWEAR TO GOD I WOULD HAVE INSULTED HER BIG TIME. WHAT THE FLIP!!! I WAS HOPING THIS WAS ONE OF YOUR STORIES, INFACT SEND ME THIS PERSONS EMAIL, I NEED TO GIVE HER A PIECE OF MY MIND!!! IM SO BURNT, I SWEAR. JUST SO WRONG ON MANY LEVELS, AND YEAH IM YELLING IN MY HEAD!!!

Dont worry sha, she'll get hers, no be curse. Please buy ankara or aso ebi with people you are VERY close to and you know wont cheat you. Pele...you didnt over react o, i would have slapped her face before iknew it. Mchewwwwwwwww some pple sef...

Lemme go read the owe translations now, hehehe

Orientatednaijababe said...

D Pelumi girl na real Ole oh.....I hope u have deleted her number......Pls tell me there is another part to this story where u actually reacted.

Sorry to have been cheated by a 419 of a friend.

Sherri said...

which kain friend?
she's def an ole alainitiju.

u just spent $200+ for ankara that may never see the light of day again?

that's exactly why i don't buy asoebi unless it's from very close friends.

just imagine the correct pair of jeans or top u can get for that money. let's not even mention shoes o

and that aunty agbaya, did she think helping meant indentured servitude?

o ku owe o ( i love the owes)
i see u got the lang kinikan for the amin, can't wait to get mine!

lol@omosewa

Jinta said...

ha allied, you scare me small o, so much owe tells me you took the incident very seriously.

ina eshi kii j'oni le'ekeji - (sorry, by keyborad at home has been mixed with tea so i cant do amin ede). I have noticed that bad people always think they are very smart, and;

eni'moni nii s'eni - people are not nice, period. my experience tells me that 90% of people are walking devils.

put it down to experience and dont fall asleep anymore. i know you know.

maithumbi said...

ur yoruba beta pass my own... and i get A1 for waec...anyways, try lan try, alubarika loju...

ablackjamesbond said...

Ile aye, afowoba fiile. Eni ete ni Peju jare.

LG said...

babes, u undareact o, so she nor chop slap eeh??? aah u fall my hand
which kind nonsense be dat?? 'hiss'
she's lucky, dat u r tooo nice.
nor worry sha, dat money must hook her 4 throat.

BTW, i m wrking on a list for d jams, i ll post it lata.

cheers!!

Sasuke said...

meeen! your friend has serious zakwa. what the hell is her problem? see how she turn aso ebi into serious wahala.
forget over reacting my dear if na me, na flying head butt i for give am ( now dats over reacting)

you are a talent my dear. i love the yoruba thingy you got going in this post 4 real

FineBoy Agbero said...

Not fair! Not fair at all. Ahn-ahn...

And I think say u too gentle sef. Me, I go don break a coupla bottles on her head. Kilode, sef? If no be say u no dey Naija, I for offer to come teach d gal some sense...

And are u egba?
Èèyàn tí ò nítìjú ojú kan ni ìbá ní; a gbórín a tó tẹṣin.[6]
This na egba proverb o.

Parakeet said...

That ur friend needs to cover her face...how can she call u a friend and dupe you like that? It reminded me of a friend that too £60 from me for beads that couldnt have cost more than £30. Why are peeps so dubious? You def are not over reacting and I think you shud keep your distance from such dishonest peeps in the future.

This quote made me laff a lot "Well, you have to be assigned a task. It is the reason you are wearing the Ankara." ROFL!

laspapi said...

You're so sweet, allied. 'Behold a Nazarene in whom there is no guile'...I would have scattered the place.

You tell a good story too...

misspumping said...

you have to be joking

N.I.M.M.O said...

From the comment you left on my blog, I'd wanted to ask if you were an Ara Oke but from Fineboy's comment here, I'd ask if you were Egba.

The dialect you write seems like either. Are you?

About your 'friend'?. Eni a fe la mo, a o mo eni to f'eni.

Sha said...

Hahahaaha permit me to laugh..lol
but dat sucks sha servers ankara? LMAOOO
and y is the shege dat expensive? isnt ankara hella cheaper than that? some ppl dey over-do dis aso-ebi nonsense sef...

Sha said...

and dat peju na crook oh.. kai.. wot da hell.. she sold u free ankara.. LMAOOO gaddemit.. some naija babes sef... omo mehn dis ish is hilarious.

sorry love.. *mwah*

Afolabi said...

Wow, thanks to 14th and serenity, I found your blog. I have enjoyed your stories and how naturally you write them-plus your strong command of Yoruba (green-no-black-with envy). This is one thing I have a problem with our culture; it sometimes feels like we don't know respect should reciprocated, not withstanding one's age..

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Anonymous said...

http://chiomamom.blogspot.com/2008/06/your-man-bridesmaid-caught-in-act-day.html

LG said...

babes, sorry abt d delay. heres a lil list:
Shank-julie
Charlie boy- ninja bike
Jazzman olofin- sho like e
Kc presh- shokori bobo
OJB- pum pum
Big bamo- ko won je
Psquare- roll it
Psquare- do me
Dbanj- pere
Dbanj- close to u
Naeto c- kini big deal (i guess)

Today's ranting said...

Your friend didnt do well at all. This is so heartless. The way people go about this aso ebi thingy is quite funnt these days. Ow u dey?

NaijaBabe said...

Ahn, no but as in that was ridiculous.
Thats absolutely rubbish.
I was about to blame the aunty Bose, that she doesnt know how to speak to people, but then thats the impression she was given.
But your friend messed up sha. That wasnt fair

guerreiranigeriana said...

...uh...i don't think you're overreacting at all...in fact, you friend is lucky you were so calm...that type of nonsense is unacceptable...you need to demand your money back, rubbish...

Waffarian said...

Damn...why no call am 419? That one na 419 na...na wah for people oh...you should have plucked her eyes out.

schic said...

Men! On too many levels are was your friend wrong...

My dear, next time, please don't pay nothing more than $60 for ankara and gele...Check the market price both in nigeria and Ghana...I hate to make u feel worse, but u were cheated real bad!

and then to think it was actually free...jeezz...don't even know what to say...but that's not a very nice friend sha...

Ms. Catwalq said...

men, i would have cursed her out infront of everybody. abi o ya were ni?
ole ni yen....

Naapali said...

I imagine the $205 total you spent on this Aso Ebi would have fitted you out nicely at some boutique with a dress you could wear more than once without being mistaken for the help.

I also believe you do not need friends like Peju, what she did was steal from you and you do not need friends like that.

Meanwhile you need to hook me up with the font that allows you type Yoruba apart from the fact that I could take lessons from you.

aloted said...

men i am feeling the yoruba in this post men..u shld write a book with yoruba proverb...i will be ur first customer..

anyway i dont think u overreacted o..haba Peju didnt do well at all..and she is ur friend? no no no...that is soooo wrong..disrepect!

Adekunle Shobowale said...

It's not too late to woz the Peju girl correct slap.

Which kain thief be that?